Browsing tag: books

I've never been seasick. I know, however, that seasickness is terrible. I've seen people seasick. Friends, you know. It's a miserable thing that folds you over the side of the boat, heaving and dizzy. I play with seasickness sometimes. Imagining that it's got me, that I'm beginning to feel that heaviness in my throat and that uneasy lurching in my belly. And then for a moment, maybe I really am seasick. Maybe. But I'll never know, because the experiment ends there. I stop imagining, and just like that I stop being sick.

In an underground Indiana Jones style cavern. I'm going through someone else's motions, my brother's, really. He has descended a complex rigging of ladders into a crevasse where he killed three snakes. Two of one kind, and a third of a more poisonous kind. Then he discovered some other danger.

Chew Can-D, a substance from The Three Stigmata of Palmer Eldritch, with an older professor type. We are lying in bed when he tells me the drug will kick in immediately. When it does, we both rise like ghosts, our movements glowing and static filled.

I think It's not really us but a sort of dream or drug us. As in the world is a dreamed or hallucinated world. We don't use a miniature set [layout], a device from the book that lets drug users feel they've been translated to the world of their miniatures.

Rogarbe is a Hemingway book. Norman and I are in a biplane flying around the perimeter of a large lake. We are bombing targets set up for practice, probably by the Air Force. Rogarbe is Norman's favorite Hemingway book, Because it depicts prison so real.

He was in prison for four months. During that time he was fed psychotropic mushrooms. They contained some particular nutrients which he needed. The side effect was four months of tripping.

Listen: Love is not even the right word for what this thing is. It is a strange magic. A glow that alights on your features suddenly, a warm haze that transforms you entirely. One minute, you are just a girl. And the next...

At some point painful relevance springs up uninvited like weeds. A stabbing little squeeze around my heart that highlights objects, actions, music and more with a hollow memory of your presence. A gut wrenching absence of your smell, your voice, your glittering eyes.

This is not what I wanted.

At a bookstore where an animator is giving autographs. The people she is providing autographs for are aspiring artists. They are providing cells or complete animations to be signed.

I'm sitting next to the animator, a thirty-ish woman of Asian or island descent. We are talking about the fans and other things. The first fan's [proce] is an unfinished drawing of the animator. She draws a small picture of herself as a cartoon and signs.

Portrait in a greyhound toilet.

Miami, Florida. I'm in route to Mobile, Alabama. Once there, I'll be spending some time helping Gil, a friend of mine, to put the finishing touches on his boat before cruising to Key West and eventually further south.

The bus ride to Mobile is some twenty-nine hours, six of which will be spent here in the Miami Greyhound station on layover. I'm beginning to get very familiar with this station. I believe I've been here at least four times.

In a bookstore living above the rafters on the second level, not really living just there. June, the owner, is ill. As she leaves I come down to tell her I've selected a rug to buy. She's been sick ever since managing this store, it seems like. She leaves.

I descend again to select a book. The one book room is super crowded. I'm wearing glasses that get foggy because it's so crowded. I take them off and continue browsing before a King Arthur section. There is a shower and many people, hippies mostly, are showering.

I read The Beautiful and The Damned last week, followed by a few Joseph Conrad shorts, then The Kite Runner between Monday and Tuesday. Lately, I've been suffering from an inability to believe that's affecting even my reading experience. I can't tell whether my disbelief was brought on - or at least encouraged - by something in the texts, or if I'm simply spiraling into a relentless, cold cynicism that's creeping into new, unexplored areas of my life.

Driving on the interstate with my brother towards the Denver Airport, I look casually at the green, shiny signs suspended on metal poles and cross beams above the highway.

Departures.

Justin shifts into the indicated lane, barreling across the tarmac at some eighty miles an hour, then ducks his head to squint below the driver side visor towards the next set of signs.

A huge banner of signs slides into view, tidily labeling each set of two lanes as a route to a specific terminal. We swing into the appropriate lane.

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